Table of Contents
I Guess I'll Tell It Like This 1
Three True Things About The Man From That Last Poem 3
To The Guy In The Back Of The Room Complaining About Reading Another Rape Poem 5
What I've Learned About Trauma 7
The Peaches Shrivel On The Counter 9
Shell Game 10
Swallowtail 13
January 14
On Seeing Photos Of His New Girlfriend On Facebook 16
The Fisherman Takes The Fish Home & Tells Her He Loves Her 18
When He Tells The Story 20
On Kissing The Next Boy 21
Consider This Your Only Warning 22
Colfax 23
I Swore I Wouldn't Do This Again 24
He Has Another Woman's Name Tattooed On The Inside Of His Left Wrist 26
Someone Lives In Apartment Four 27
Touchdown Jesus 28
Spoiler Alert 30
There's This Story Mom Tells 33
A Coworker Asks Me If I Am Sad, Still 34
Mondegreen 35
Neville Longbottom's Boggart Attends Severus Snape's Funeral 37
In Which I Do Not Fear Harvey Dent 39
That Awful Month I Can Only Write Poems About Leaving, And/Or About Limp Bizkit 41
(Ariel Is Not The First Ursula's Made An Offer To.) 44
The Problems With First Dates, Or How To Really Really Really Not Get Laid 45
Fantastic Breasts And Where To Find Them 48
Hey, Jeff Probst! I Wanna Be On Your Show 50
What I Mean When I Say Survivor 52
Little Red Riding Hood Addresses The Next Wolf 53
Conversations About Top Chef 55
Draco Malfoy Looks Into The Mirror Of Erised 57
Anxiety: A Ghost Story 58
When I Say, "I Don't Trust Myself Around You" 62
There Are A Lot Of Villains In This Story, And Most Of Them Are Me 63
& I'm Sorry 64
It Has Been Too Long Since Anyone Has Seen Me Naked 65
Today I Am Tired Of Being A Woman 67
My Therapist Asks Me To Describe You 68
I Do 70
The Author's Mother Writes A Grocery List 71
February 72
I Am Not Clinically Crazy Anymore 73
When The Crazy Came Back 75
