Table of Contents
Introduction 11
Chapter 1 Conscious Parenting 15
The Benefits of Conscious Parenting 16
Giving Your Child Full Attention 19
Understanding Behavior 21
Important Points to Consider 22
Chapter 2 Gender 101 25
Gender Versus Sex 26
Gender Identity Versus Sexual Orientation 28
Gender Expression 31
We All Have a Gender Identity 32
Gender Expansiveness 35
Important Points to Consider 37
Chapter 3 Connecting to Your Child 39
Listen Carefully 40
Open Communication 42
Compassion 48
Respect 49
The Foundation of Home 50
Important Points to Consider 51
Your Unique Tightrope Walk 54
Let Your Child Teach You 54
"Blank Slate" Parenting 55
Examining Personal Biases 59
Coparenting 62
Your Child's Unique Gender Journey 66
Important Points to Consider 68
Chapter 5 Parenting the Gender-Expansive Child 71
Needs of the Gender-Expansive Child 72
Your Emotional Response 75
Society's Bias 77
Holidays and Celebrations 79
Responding to Difficult Situations 81
Friendship Challenges 82
Important Points to Consider 83
Chapter 6 Parenting the Transgender Child 85
Transgender Versus Gender-Expansive 86
Consistent! Persistent. Insistent? 88
Your Child's Heart and Brain, Revealed 92
Your Emotional Response 93
Needs of the Transgender Child 98
Their Alignment; Your Transition 98
Important Points to Consider 100
Chapter 7 Trust Yourself 101
Listen to Your Gut 102
Stay Within Yourself 104
Trust Your Child 105
Model Mindfulness 109
Important Points to Consider 111
Chapter 8 Stay in the Now 113
The Present 114
The Past Has Its Place 116
Worry/Fear for the Future 119
Getting the Most Out of the Now 120
Focus on Small Goals 122
Important Points to Consider 123
Chapter 9 Interventions 125
Observe and Affirm 126
Advocate 127
Living Life Fully: The Oxygen Example 128
Finding the Right Gender Therapist 131
On Being "Sure" 135
Transition Options 137
Social Transition 138
Medical Transition 143
Important Points to Consider 148
Chapter 10 Outside Influences 149
Coping with Difficult Responses 150
Opinions Galore 154
The Truth 156
Disclosure 160
Private Versus Secret 163
Important Points to Consider 167
Chapter 11 Siblings and Extended Family 169
Take Them for Ice Cream 170
Honoring a Siblings Process 171
Handling Expressions of Concern .174
Setting Boundaries with Love. 175
Pronouns 177
Important Points to Consider 179
Chapter 12 Helping Your Gender-Expansive Child with Teasing 181
Teasing Versus Bullying 182
Coaching Your Child 185
Supporting and Empowering 187
Equipping Your Child 188
Important Points to Consider 191
Chapter 13 School 193
Advocating for Your Child 194
The Gender Climate 196
Legalities and Other Logistics to Consider 200
Important Points to Consider 203
Chapter 14 Dysphoria 205
Body Dysphoria 206
Social Dysphoria 207
Don't Poke the Dysphoria Monster 208
Overlap with Anxiety/Depression 211
Autism and Gender Dysphoria 213
Important Points to Consider 214
Chapter 15 Coping and Self-Care 217
Coping 218
Utilize Your Strengths 220
Be Forgiving and Kind to Yourself. 221
Support and Assistance 222
Staving Connected to Others 223
Important Points to Consider 224
Appendix A Sample Letter from Parents 225
Appendix B Facets and Multiplicities of You, 228
Appendix C Spectrums 230
Appendix D Transition Worksheet 231
Appendix E Resources 232
Appendix F Classroom Rules 234
Index 235
