The Polyamory Workbook: An Interactive Guide to Setting Boundaries, Communicating Your Needs, and Building Secure, Healthy Open Relationships

Successfully navigate nonmonogamous relationships with this practical workbook filled with activities, journal prompts, interviews, and more activities designed to make polyamory work for you and your loved ones.

What makes nonmonogamy feel good? Where do we draw the line between loving, freedom-based relationships and a free-for-all? How can you make the joyful, secure polyamorous relationships you want a reality? The Polyamory Workbook not only answers these questions, but also helps you determine what you really want when it comes to your life, your relationships, and the community you build-and how to get it.

Packed with helpful journal prompts, activities, and advice designed to make polyamory work for you and your loved ones, The Polyamory Workbook draws key information from real polyamorous people and relationship experts to help you expand your emotional and relational toolbox, better preparing you for the dive into nonmonogamy. This workbook focuses on the foundational knowledge everyone interested in or already practicing polyamory should know, including:

Types of nonmonogamy Communication styles Boundary setting Consent Metamours and jealousy Pitfalls and red flags Breakups And more!

Whether you're new to nonmonogamy or have been practicing polyamory for a while, The Polyamory Workbook will help you identify and break away from fear-based relationships and journey toward freer, more joyful connections.

ISBN-13: 9781646044061

Media Type: Paperback

Publisher: Ulysses Press

Publication Date: 11-15-2022

Pages: 160

Product Dimensions: 7.40(w) x 9.20(h) x 0.50(d)

Sara Youngblood Gregory is a lesbian writer and poet. Her work explores queerness, sexual wellness, disability, kink and polyamory. Sara serves on the board of the lesbian literary and arts journal Sinister Wisdom, and her work has been featured in various publications, including Vice, DAME, HuffPost, Refinery29, and Bustle. Her chapbook RUN. is out with Finishing Line Press in Fall 2022.

Table of Contents

Introduction 9

Section 1 The Basics of Ethical Nonmonogamy 23

Chapter 1 Talking Polyamory with Sam of Shrimp Teeth 26

Chapter 2 Approaching Polyam Relationships 36

Polyam Toolkit 36

Let's Check In 45

Chapter 3 Making the Switch from a Monogamous to a Polyamorous Mindset 48

Unhealthy versus Healthy Expectations 51

Scarcity and Abundance 53

Chapter 4 Hard Feelings and How We React to Them 58

What Are Hard feelings? 59

How to Use Hard Feelings 66

Making Your Self-Soothing Plan 69

Section 2 Rules, Boundaries, Agreements, and How We Can Make Room for Positive Conflict 71

Chapter 5 Talking Boundaries with Crystal Byrd Farmer 74

Chapter 6 Consent 82

Agency 83

Power 84

Communication 85

Chapter 7 The Three Dynamics: Rules, Agreements, and Boundaries 87

Rules 88

Agreements 90

Boundaries 94

Accountability 105

Section 3 Finding and Maintaining Community 113

Chapter 8 In Conversation with a Real-Life Polycule 116

Chapter 9 Community 128

Where to Find Community 129

Chapter 10 Vetting 132

Conversation 133

References 135

Community 135

Red Flags in Vetting 136

Chapter 11 Breakups: The Hard Part of Community 139

Frequent Causes for Polyam Breakups 140

Tips for Dealing with a Breakup 142

Final Thoughts 149

Taking a Final Moment 150

Recommended Reading and Resources 153

Acknowledgements 158

About the Author 159

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