Table of Contents
Introduction: The World Gould Use More Kindness 11
The Season of Discovery
I Understanding Kindness
1 Being Nice Isn't the Same as Being Kind 17
2 If I Were Always Kind, I Wouldn't Be Doing This 22
3 The Chasm between Kindness and Unkindness 26
4 Kindness and Indifference Cannot Coexist 30
II Why Kindness Matters: Its Benefits and Power
5 Perform Two Acts of Kindness and Call Me in the Morning 35
6 Bibbidi-Bobbidi-Boo: Kindness Alleviates Social Anxiety 41
7 An Epidemic of Our Own Choosing 45
3 The Business Case for Kindness 49
III Opening Strategies for a Kind Life
9 The Power of the Pause 57
10 Kindness Means Suspending Judgment 61
11 Kindness and Keeping Score 65
12 "Kill Transform 'cm with Kindness": A Lesson from My Mother 69
13 Dancing with Discovery: Taking Time to Notice the Kindness in Your Life 73
The Season of Understanding
I Barriers to Kindness
14 When Fear Gets in the Way of Kindness 79
15 When We Don't Have Time for Kindness 84
16 I Don't Have the Patience for This! 88
17 Other Barriers to Kindness 93
II Resistance to Kindness
18 Rejecting Kindness 101
19 On the Receiving End of Kindness 105
20 It All Starts with Kindness to Self 108
21 No Kindness Is Ever Too Small 113
III Opening Our Lives to Kindness
22 Kindness and Abundance: Enough Is Enough! 119
23 Gratitude Is a Companion to Kindness 123
24 Kindness and Generosity: It's Not All about Money 129
25 Pay Attention: Kindness Requires Presence 134
26 Dancing with Understanding: Two Steps Forward, One Step Back 138
The Season of Choosing
I The Tools of Kindness
27 A Life of Kindness Requires Courage 143
28 Kindness and Curiosity 146
29 Kindness and Vulnerability 150
30 Choosing to Be For or Against 155
II Choosing Kindness
31 What Do You Want Your Legacy to Be? 161
32 Extending Kindness to All: Kindness Isn't Selective or Conditional 164
33 Oh, the Stones We Tell! 168
34 What Are You Looking For (Really)? 172
III Dealing with Unkindness
35 Big Bullies 181
36 Little Bullies: Where It All Begins 186
37 By standing … or Standing Up for Kindness? 190
38 Choosing Our Cyber-Voices and Media Companions 195
39 Dancing with Yes: Dance like No One's Watching 200
The Season of Becoming
I Challenges to Kindness
40 When My Kindness Is Your "Yuck!" 205
41 What If I Don't Feel Like Being Kind? 208
42 Being Kind to People We Don't Like 214
43 I'm Just Sayin'… Honesty Isn't Always Kind 218
44 When the Kindest Thing to Do Is … Absolutely Nothing 224
II Creating a Kinder World
45 A Transformation or an Evolution? The Five Percent Plan 231
46 What We Want Most for Our Kids 234
47 Kindness to the Earth and All Its Creatures 239
48 Strategies for Bringing Kindness into Your Life 246
III Living Kindness Every Day: Your Kindness Legacy
49 Kind Actions That Cost Nothing and Take Little Time 255
50 A Dozen Reasons to Choose Kindness 258
51 The Lessons of Kindness 262
52 The Never-Ending Dance: A Kindness Manifesto 268
Notes 273
Acknowledgments 283
About the Author 287